Chuck Norris @ WX Comedy

<>GO AHEAD, LAUGH OUT LOUD<>

Welcome to WX Comedy's Chuck Norris Section

Here at our home of Chuck Norris, you can read every Chuck Norris Joke that I could personally find and enjoyed. The Jokes are from assorted websites and my own sense of humor. All of the sites used are listed with links to the left.

~Chuck's Bio~

Chuck Norris was born as Carlos Ray Norris on March 10, 1940. He has been a well-known star of the show, "Texas Walker Ranger" and yes, he does his own stunts (Of course). His fighting career lasted from 1965-1970 and is an expert in multiple fields of Martial Arts. He was crowned Fighter of the Year by "Black Belt" Magazine in 1969. Chuck Norris may only be 5'10" but he has the power of a 7'0" man.

Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on
Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. It was
more "humane."

12 Facts About Chuck Norris

1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

2. A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles".
Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he
exploded.

3. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead
decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter
he grew a beard.

4. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the
JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his
beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

5. The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck
Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and
starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from
drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far
too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.

6. Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift
of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen,
jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined
influence
to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of
roundhouse kick related deaths.

7. Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by
yelling, "Bang!"

8. When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from
cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also
requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on
his back. Oh yea, and he always makes it to Oregon before you.

9. Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is
injected with five times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer.
This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt
to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.

10. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

11. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are
trademarked names for his left and right legs.

12. Chuck Norris once tried to sue Burger King after they refused to
put razor wire in his Whopper Jr., insisting that that actually is "his"
way.

More Chuck Norris Jokes