Chuck Norris Page 2 @ WX Comedy

Chuck Norris @ WX Comedy

<>GO AHEAD, LAUGH OUT LOUD<>

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke
the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earnhart while
she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and
unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was
finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his
soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and
admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every
second Wednesday of the month.

Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned
beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people
dead.

Chuck Norris never misspells a word. If he does, he simply changes the
spelling.

Chuck Norris found out about Conan O'Brien's lever that shows clips from
"Walker: Texas Ranger" and is working on a way to make it show clips of
Norris having sex with Conan's wife.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

Chuck Norris doesn't have normal white blood cells like you and I. His have
a small black ring around them. This signifies that they are black belts in
every form of martial arts and they roundhouse kick the crap out of viruses. That's why Chuck Norris never gets ill.

Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can
"accidentally" beat the crap out of little kids.

When Chuck Norris jumps into a pool he doesn't get wet, the pool gets Chuck Norrised

Most old movies were in black and white because unless they contained violence and bloodshed, Chuck Norris wouldn't allow the director to use color.

Chuck Norris' blood is 50% arsenic. The other half is the cure for AIDS.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris

Don't fear the reaper. Fear Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris once overdrew his checking account, the result was the great depression.

Chuck Norris was born 10 months premature.

In a recent television interview with Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris responded to every one of the interviewer's questions by pointing to his belt buckle which read "NOT MY PROBLEM". after about 5 minutes of this, Chuck Norris said, "Interview over," and roundhouse kicked the reporter. Witnessing this, the cameraman screamed, "You killed him!" Chuck Norris pointed at his belt buckle and flew away.

The movie Rambo: First Blood was inspired by Chuck Norris' experience as a boy scout.

Chuck Norris has 92 chromosomes rather than the normal 46, meaning he is scientifically twice as good as any other human in existence.

"Chuck E. Cheese's" was originally named "Chuck Norris's," but after one too many children died in roundhouse-related incidents, management decided to take the franchise in a new direction.

When Chuck Norris was born, his parents sent a group of miners into the depths of Africa to find a diamond pure enough to cut his beard. They are still searching.

Even More Chuck Norris Jokes

Back to Chuck Norris Home